“Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting—He will never disappoint you!” Psalms 27:14 TPT
18 months, 18 of the longest months I’ve ever know! The world is a completely different place and life is trying to get back to normal. I wonder if I’ll ever know normal again, I wonder if things will start to be less stressful and I’ll finally be able to breathe again.
In the last year and a half I’ve faced a pandemic that’s changed the world, been hurt and betrayed by people I loved and respected, changed jobs and been diagnosed with a panic disorder. I’ve reached the edge of myself and all my strength has gone and I could just about function. I’ve had to re-evaluate a lot of things in my life and the only thing that’s stayed constant is my faith in God.
I’ve learnt that when life is the darkest and I feel the most alone I have someone who has never left my side. I have God and He has never disappointed me, people and life have but not my Father in heaven. He has been right by my side helping me through this all, He reminded me of His love, faithfulness and grace. He has reminded me as tears run down my face that He is here and He loves me, that He is everything I need. He’s reminded me that He’s been hurt and rejected but He still loved us enough to send His son Jesus, that even though we reject Him He still loves us and died for us.
In this time I’ve learnt to be thankful of the people who have stuck by my side, who have spoken words of love and encouragement, also correction reminding me of promises from God. I’ve been close to giving up, been impatient and just disappointed in life but this verse keeps me going – Psalms 27:14 TPT, it reminds me I have to be brave, I can’t lose hope because God never disappoints.
It also reminds me that I need to entwine myself in the Lord, I have a picture of two threads being woven together so that they can’t be separated, this is what this means. I need to keep my faith in God and remember that He is there. All I need to do is reach out and talk, share my heart because He’s there. He is my rock and light and I know that if it wasn’t for Him I wouldn’t be here now. I would have given up and just thrown in the towel but God is faithful and He has been restoring me and helping me heal from the hurt.
This is why I haven’t been able to write, I haven’t had Words to describe how I’ve been. I’m now starting to have this desire to share and encourage again, I know it’s been a long time and I never just want to write for the sake of it, I only write what’s in my heart. I want to encourage you and uplift you, so as we start to face life again with some more normality remember that we are the light in this world to show the love of God. Be kind to people and love them because we all hurt and have hidden battles, you never know what a smile or kind word could do for someone. God bless